Continuing with my musings on ways to understand and process our emotions, today it occurred to me that I’ve got some conflicting thoughts on what to do with emotional pain, and that writing about them and hearing your thoughts as well (please comment below) could help me resolve them.
So here’s the dilemma….
On the one hand I believe that my feelings – no matter what anyone (apparently) does or says to me – are 99% about me – my cellular memories, beliefs and imprints, my karma and current stage of spiritual evolution, and my soul’s plans for me – all of which created the experience in the first place as a way of helping me learn and grow. And that, therefore, it’s up to me to address the hurt within myself. In other words, no one can fix for me what was created within me.
On the other hand I believe that the relationship aspect is important to – that total honesty, including about all our feelings, is critical to relationships, that our experiences are CO-creations that develop through social interaction, and that feedback and compassionate response can be critical factors when it comes to noticing our effect on the world (in order to become more effective in the ways we consciously choose to be) as well as recognizing and healing our triggers.
After all, we do have the ability to communicate for a reason.
So here are the questions:
Could we heal and evolve in isolation?
Is talking about a hurt – even sometimes to the point of screaming or crying to someone else – a necessary element of the alchemy of transformation or is it much less helpful than heretofore believed?
Can even blame become a path to growth if responded to in a way that helps the one doing it shift the perspective and reclaim their power and the one committing the perceived offense become more aware, emotionally skilled and compassionate?
Or put another way: Is there anything that is better left unsaid?
I invite your comments.